A black mom in America

Tonight I had to have "the talk" with my son. He is 9 years old. No, this talk was not about the birds and the bees. I wish it was though. This talk is the talk that black mothers and fathers must have with their children; especially their sons. See, we had to sit down and have a conversation about if police ever pull us over, and/or stops in front of us. Sadly, this is not the last time I will have to have this talk with my son. I will have another talk when he turns 15 and is applying for a driver's permit. Myon and I could not decide when to have this talk we knew it was coming but had not decided exactly what age was appropriate. You see Tamir Rice was 11 years old. I knew it had to be before then. The talk goes a little something like this: "When you get pulled over as soon as they turn on the lights pull out your wallet, get your ID, and insurance. Place them both on the dashboard. Roll your window down. Then place both hands on the steering wheel on 10 and 2. When the officer approaches the window listen to his instructions and then hand him your information. Do not make any sudden movements and make sure your hands are seen at all times. Always reply with yes sir and no sir when asked a question. Be respectful at all times even if you feel like you've been pulled over unjustly. The goal of this stop is TO COME HOME ALIVE. You do everything in your power to come home alive. If we get pulled over and you are in the back seat do not make any sudden movements. Keep your hands where they can be seen at all times and sit up straight. Only speak when spoken to. Be quiet and wait until you get the ok from one of us to move. If a cop rolls up on you like they did Tamir Rice put your hands up as fast as you can and wait for instructions. If the instructions are confusing stand there with your hands up and do not move. Sadly, Tamir Rice didn't have a chance to do any of this. He was dead on the arrival of the cops. Mike Brown had his hands up. Philandro Casto told the officer he had a weapon and his license. None of this guarantees that you get home, but you have more of a chance. None of these people were at fault. The cops were at fault. If you are in the car with white friends and they are talking back to the police shut your mouth do not say a word. Sit there with your hands in plain sight, and only speak when spoken too. Again, you have one goal. COME HOME ALIVE." This is my reality. This is being black in America. Again, my son is 9 years old. I will have to have this talk again in 6 years. My prayer is that this movement will create such a change that I won't have to.

One Love,

DQue